Today's rant :

I have already mentionned that I'm not close to my father's family. They never showed any interest in me, and I don't care about people who don't care about me, and I don't like people who can make an 8 year old schoolgirl feel that they don't love her. So yeah. I really don't give a damn about them.

You know what happened last week, for my birthday ?
Usually, my grandmother writes me a check of whatever amount. This year, my grandfather died, so she gave every child of the family 200$. My father teased me and gave it to me "for your birthday" - and this year, my grandmother didn't give me anything for my birthday. Not that this hurts me or whatever, I actually hadn't even noticed before my mother realized it and told me.
So she gave me 200$ for my birthday - except that she also gave 200$ to every child, who are all going to get something else for their birthday.

My uncle - who also happens to be my godfather, and who therefore should be more interested in me (in theory, that is) - decided that once I turned 18, I didn't need gifts anymore. He and my aunt also usually give me money.
Thing is, I turned 18 a year ago. And he was supposed to tell me last year that I wouldn't get anything from then on - and he freakin' didn't.
I mean damn it, he's my g o d f a t h e r, and he wants nothing to do with me anymore. Then again, I have nothing to do with them either, except that, you know, a simple "happy birthday" would've been nice.
My aunt called us a few days after my birthday to ask us if her husband had told us they'd stop giving me a gift each year. Which he had not.
You know what I mean ? He could've freakin' told me, I would be that less mad if he had.

'Cuz I really don't care about the gifts. I really don't. I understand that they don't give a damn about me, and because I don't either, I know how annoying it is for them to remember my birthday and all.
Except that, you know, my aunts and uncles on my mother's side don't have much money, and each year when my birthday comes, they give me a small something, apologizing because they can't afford to give me anything more, or they tell me they're going to give me something "later" because they're pretty broke at the moment, and I always tell them that they don't have to give me anything, that I'm grown up and I don't need gifts and all - and I mean it. It happens sometimes that they don't give me anything, and I barely notice, and it doesn't bother me - except that they do wish me a happy birthday.

If you've followed my train of thoughts, you've now come to encounter the gap between people who care, and people who act like they care. See my appreciation of fake stuff.

Yes, I'm mad. I know my parents - and my mother is their daughter's godmother - would never have done such a thing. Never. And when she turns 18, she won't be anything either.
I hate it because it's too theorical, planned, this'll-help-this-year's-budget like - it's simply shouting at the face of the freakin' world that WE DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU AND WE'VE BEEN FORCING OURSELVES TO AND NOW IT'S OVER.

Ha. And this probably means no Christmas gifts either. Wanna bet my older sister never stopped getting gifts from them - just because she's close to them ? No, you don't.

Yeah. I'll remember them when I'm rich and famous and freakin' Christmas come.