Ever get that feeling that this one thing you have to do will bring you this feeling of closure you've been waiting for ?

Remember that time I talked about this feeling that you're on the verge of something, almost there ?

That's what it is.
There's something you feel you have to do, and you feel that when you finally do it and get it right, everything will fall into place and you'll finally see the whole picture.
Me ?
Lately, I feel like there's something I have to write. But I have to write it perfectly. Find the best point of view, the best words, the best everything.
And the more time goes by, the more the idea is pounding in my head that ihavetodoitveryveryverysoonnowrightnow - because when I do that, I'm finally gonna be there.

Because I feel like I am so close to IT, whatever it is and means, I feel like it's in my grasp...

But human beings expect closure from a lot of things. And as much as I want to have my story written, as much as I feel the urge to do it, I can't because I am scared that this closure won't come out of it after all.

It's stupid, but it's me - once I read a book about the Titanic. And at some point I had to force myself to read it - I wouldn't keep reading because I didn't want the ship to sink.
Somehow I just got reminded of something I read about how different people react to pressure to perform. Some people will go to amazing extents to please everyone, and others will not even try, out of fear that they won't be able to make it.

Anyways. Can anyone tell me - how do little things matter so much ? How can little things hold you back ?