Because damn it, I get to deal how I choose, and as I am not very good at dealing, I just may not have so many choices as to how I do it.

And you don't get to complain, to bawl, to question the way I'm dealing, to ask for pity or to behave like a victim. You know why ? Because you don't get to forget that you are the one who barged into MY life, took everything you wanted away from ME as if everything in sight was yours, as if you had any sort of right to think you were the center of everybody's world and you don't get to forget that you are the one who burned my entire world down on fucking purpose and screwed up my ENTIRE LIFE.

And honestly, if you had ever thought you wanted me in your life, you never would've pushed me out of my own life and behaved as the kind of person nobody wants in their life.

And yes, I know this is slightly aggressive, but I'm just really sick of people getting on my back as if I was the one who's done something wrong. Fucking sick of people choosing to be blind to the fact that I AM THE ONE who lost EVERYFUCKINGTHING and that I am a victim, damn it, and this means I fucking hurt. Can you understand that? Can you stop and see that other people screwed with MY life and that MY life is not back to normal and will NEVER BE back to normal?

Why would I be doing this on purpose? I said it before: I don't believe in revenge. I am just trying to deal - and my job isn't to ease things for anybody other than myself. Maybe I'd like for things to be right again, but unfortunately, it's not up to me to make that happen. You made your decision, and all I can do now is choose what kind of people I want in my life. You have no idea the sort of pain I am in. No fucking idea. I let you in and trusted you once and you clearly demonstrated what that meant to you and how much I was worth to you; some things everybody knows they just aren't allowed to do and when they chose to do them anyways they can't expect understanding; and letting people like you in my life is just inviting more pain in - and erasing you is the solution that steals the least energy.