Because IM conversations can be oh so entertaining:
(you'll notice the return of the Quartzian Witness Protection Program)

Quartz says:
I'm blaming my next depression on you.
Rob says :
No way, I just suggested the cure for your depression already.
Quartz says :
Which was?
Rob says:
Rabbit Pearl
Quartz says:
Rabbit Pearl doesn't give affection either.
Quartz says:
I need affection.
Rob says:
That's what the cat is for.

--

Censored Identity says:
Drilling is fun.
Quartz says:
That's why women need men around: they like drilling.
Quartz says:
How is it fun?
Censored Identity says:
We like drilling women.
Censored Identity says:
It's a very satisfying thing to do.
Quartz says:
Figured that one out.
Censored Identity says:
We like holes. All kinds of holes.