I internalize. I only externalize things when I've dealt with them. When I'm ready to let them out.

I sure hope you guys know that although a lot of what I write here is just this-is-what-I-did-today, most of the time there is more to it and the greatest part of my writing is the result of much work.

Words and phrases are constantly whirling around in my head, constantly triggered by everything I see, hear and feel and they never completely vanish. They remain in my head, sometimes they pop up again so I can add substance to them, but they always do pop up again until they've matured enough and they're ready to come out.

So a lot of the time, whether I start with a word or with a phrase, the writing will be comlpete weeks or even months after the initial trigger. And I don't give a damn about the delay: externalizing is the whole point although everytime I am amazed by the power words carry if you know what to do with them.

I'm not sure where it comes from but I sure know some people have tried to torture me with words and it could never have worked because they couldn't write. I'm not sure where I would be on a rating scale, but I know I can move you, I can make you cry, I can drown you, I can piss you off, I can make you fight - and I can soothe you.

But I can't help it - I have to externalize. There's a bigger picture and this is what I'm focusing on.

So maybe I should stop focusing on it and just go for the power. What should my next topic be, people ? I'm thinking How to Ruin Multiple Relationships In Three Months (available in two versions: for men and for women) or Top 10 Lies of Trashy Whores/Bastards - Canadian Edition or What Happens When You're Too Nice - Uncensored Edition (including juicy tidbits, names, photographs, adresses and phone numbers). Or anything else, suggestions welcome.

What do you want this place to be, people ?
'Cuz I can make it trashy, I sure fucking can, just say it if that's what you're looking for.