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I'll never glow the way that you glow

I envy you. You're unbelievably lucky, and you are in no way aware of it.

You have something I lost forever: a place to go back to. Somewhere to belong, to fit in; a place to call yours, which becomes empty when you leave. You have a place to miss, and you have a place that misses you.

You have certainty, you have continuity.

You might not have a happy ending, but you have a happy beginning.

I have then and now; I have before and after. I have former and frighteningly new. I have done and not begun.

I have in between.

Here I am; I have no past - and I have the heaviest baggage in the world.